Overcoming Insecurities
Most of us are unaware of our insecurities and we try to mask it with a façade of false strength. But how can we be more self-aware in listening to the voice of self-confidence rather than battering ourselves with the voice of insecurities? Here, Coach Lyqa Maravilla and Joyce Pring discussed how they can just not deal with it, but be friends with it.
We all have this false assumption that everyone’s got it figured out, we don’t have insecurities anymore. And because of the empowerment movement, people think that you don’t have to be insecure about these things anymore. Kasi you’re constantly empowered in our society today. (JP)
How do you conquer insecurities?
○ To be in a situation na nare-reveal itong insecurities na ito sa atin. One of the biggest hurdles to get over is denial. We have to be exposed to the pain that insecurities bring with the anxieties that comes with it and minsan it catches it us off-guard (LM)
○ Realize insecurities have always existed, will always exist, and they exist for literally everybody, even those who say that they don’t have insecurities. We’re imperfect by nature and meron tayong self-awareness. If wala kang insecurity, you are not self-aware enough for thinking about the things that could be improved about you. (JP)
○ Sometimes, it’s just living with it. Not living in spite of it. Be friends with it. Know that it’s present. (LM)
○ We have to understand that when we look at our insecurities, we have a number of options - either you change it, change your reaction, or change other people’s opinions about your insecurities. At least go with the first two - is this something I really want to change, what are the steps I can take to change this; the second thing is just changing your reaction because no matter how hard I try people will still write comments. (LM)
Reclaiming Your Power
Understand that it’s just a voice & fill your world with voices that speak against it. (LM)
How WE conquered it
○ I just befriended it. I saw myself in the eyes of people that loved me and not just that but in the eyes of my Creator - that there is so much value in who I am and what I have to offer, it might that be the smartest or the best voice in the rooms that I walked into, but it is the best that I could give and that is enough. (JP)
○ Security. What would make you feel secure to the point that you’re no longer insecure? It’s when you’re not alone, so at the very least stay together, lean against each other. It’s very hard to feel secure when you’re by yourself. (LM)
○ Build stronger walls to keep them out of sight of other people which is very unhealthy way of doing things. We can go to that rot, to the extremes. (LM)
○ I start doing myself a chance. I started doing things differently. There I realized that I’m not as bad as people say I am. (LM)
“When it comes to my insecurity, at the end of the day, hindi ko rin sya kailangan patunayan sa ibang tao.”
3 A’s From Joyce Pring
Acknowledge, Accountability, Acceptance
It’s so important that you hear and listen to these things that people say about you, the stories that they tell about you and then differentiate them with the reality that you now have, and that you know is true. (JP)
KEEP IN MIND
You have to be secure in knowing that this too shall pass. Sit with it, feel it but understand that there will be another day coming. You can eventually grow out of it. (LM)
Once you start losing hope, that’s when life really ends. Start conversations with people who love you and whom you can share your insecurities with. Knowing that you have people who can empathize with you is in itself a healing. (JP)
If the people who have experienced the worst kind of traumas have the capacity to step outside of those traumas and become people who are able and eager to conquer them and grow and use those traumas to become better people - then you are capable of taking your insecurities as well and using them for using that can fuel you to become better. (JP)
From Episode 92 of Adulting with Joyce Pring: “OVERCOMING INSECURITIES”: